Another sleepless night and nothing is going right. I shouldn't have taken that afternoon nap.
I went for a swim today evening.
Breast stroke, freestyle and backstroke are what I am familiar with.
I had a good time. I always enjoy swimming and only complain about washing and drying my hair afterward.
As I lay in bed wide awake I think about how my life is in general and the way things are going right now. Just as I lay floating on the water face up paddling my feet and raising my hands out of the water to push forward. All I see is the ceiling of the swimming pool area, my ears submerged in water enough to make me deaf to the noises around.
Should I be worried that I dont know where am headed? Could I bang my head on the wall of the pool or will someone drown my head (my brother and a friend do that to me all the time I try backstroke ... Grrrr) Backstroke requires that you keep your head looking up, no turning to the right or left, and keep going till you reach the end unlike other swimming stokes where you can look forward and know where you are headed.
In spite all this doubt you must relax your body and trust the water to make you float.
I realize I am swimming through life right now doing a backstroke. I can't see anything ahead of me but I look up and know that God "goes before me always".
Even though am flooded with worries the only way out is to let go, relax, float and let myself be carried by the things I am not in control of. And instead of drowning my head in worries I turn to the brighter side and do a backstroke.. and keep doing it till I reach.. and where do I reach? Somewhere. Anywhere not flodded by the worries of the world. Until then I just have to paddle, keep moving, have faith and breathe. I just have to swim and let others swim.... and have fun.
PS: Just floating on my back I just so relaxing... but... life is not like that :D
